in His hands now

Words which you can readily spit out, like, ‘I know it’s my fault for not doing that paper well because I didn’t revise properly.’ doesn’t sound very convincing in execution. It’s like a ready made excuse to absolve you from any consequences.

At any rate, I can’t think of any other words to better describe the paper I did in the morning. The paper was done okay, but at the same time, not okay. It’s not typical of me to not want to think of the paper. Goes against the fibre of my character. I live to pinpoint and debate my position. It’s like there’s so many bloody mistakes I’m just better off not caring for it.

Really, ignorance isn’t bliss. It just delays the inevatible.

But to pinpoin the whole darn mess, I would have to go back to holidays. I mean it’s stupid to blame a holiday for screwing up your exams but I dunno, something changed during those holidays.

Meh, more blame-shifting.

I still have three more exams. I just hope I can pull it off to get the results to savage this semester.Something would have to be done next semester though. Hm.

meep?

I’m always looking for a source of escape.

Of course the internet is one way, with so much information to trawl through, one’s brain surely cannot complain.

And of course there’s always gaming, good ‘ole gaming. A different world, a world where I can be bloodthirsty, crazy, mad…

The newspapers, where a world much bigger than me, yet in a lot of ways unconnected and at times so fascinating, I can reach out to, too.

So many places to run to… So many hiding spots.

So many places not to be me.

mild.

Who am I kidding?

Prepping for exams is much worse than rushing for a project. At least when I’m doing the darn project, usually I’m rushing it with people. Revising for the darn exams leaves me alone at home. It’s so…

Isolating. And I can’t exactly go out and study with people because deep down in me, I know I won’t keep to what I’m supposed to do. At least at home I can guilt trip myself to do something. Outside I’m just going along with the flow.

At least exams are crammed into one week. Although it doesn’t leave much time for last minute studying, I can get this damn semester over and done with. Definitely the most tiring one so far. I just want to start anew, again.

I hope the rest of you poly people are doing better. Gosh I hate exams.

oddly optimistic.

The Olympics is one of the few moments a guy can sneak a peek at women’s bottoms without being called a pervert. Really, just watch gymnastics for 5 minutes and I guarantee you’d get at enough close up shots of the before-mentioned region to last you a lifetime.

Bah, was watching gymnastics with my family. It’s very cool though, that sport. Elegant and graceful.

So yah, interspersed with all that mugging came with some time for me to enjoy a little bit of what the sporting world has to offer.

A week left to exams. It’s been a bit challenging today, but surprisingly productive. Managed to do much more than what I did on average last week. I do really need pressure to focus huh.

As usual, good luck everyone. Don’t fret if exams come too quickly, just have faith!

here we go again.

How do you see life? Something which simplicity explains all? Or do you have to scrape past the surface, dig a little hole and find what you’re really looking for?

Simplicity and complexity…

I for one, have been chided one time too many for seeing things as having multiple layers. People say I shouldn’t read too much into things, take it at face value so to speak.

But on the flipside, people say sometimes I’ve got to reject the front that I see before me and peel it. Peel it to reveal what people really mean. People don’t tell you what they really mean, they hide the truth you know.

Aw come on. Which one is it? My life’s too short to worry if there are hidden meanings to people’s actions, or if I’m seeing too much into things. Really, I’ve got better things to do in my life.

Seriously, it’s bull like that that makes me such a cautious person. In the name of all thing’s good and lovely people, don’t hide behind that mask. Don’t make life a duality. Just speak the truth.

Tactfully, of course.

Don’t be a superman,

If all you really have are blow-up muscles.

eh, best I could come up with.

20 days left!

Revision will start!

Exercise will precede each day’s activities!

Nothing will break my focus!

No distractions!

exam blues are semi-annual blues

Alright, sorry for being lazy.

But but but I’m feeling lazy to think about my days these few… days. It’s just so much easier to breeze through life without thinking about your actions and their consequences. Just woosh… and wheeee.

Life’s been kind, I’ve just finished the last of my projects. Right now exams are in two weeks time and I have got to, GOT to study awesomely hard these two weeks. I don’t think I can afford the laziness which has routinely accompanied my final exams the last two semesters. Something a bit short of a herculean effort is needed to retain my grades this round.

Hohum, attachment draws nearer too as with the exams. I really should squeeze the juice out of the 2 days that I’m gonna get as holiday before I start my attachment. After that I’ll just be another cog in the workings of the Singaporean finance sector…

Either that or I’ll just be the paper shredder boy.

P.S. The iPhone is looking mighty tempting. And I just got the current phone at the beginning of this year!

Embrace who you are, for that little you do will shape someone’s day.

i’m not dead, yet

Sorry for the lack of updates, one cannot be called busy if one actually finds time to reflect about the day.

So anyway, The Dark Knight was great. For a person who finds watching movies a second time a chore, I’m rather looking forward to watching it a second time this saturday.

No doubt heath ledger’s performance as the joker warrants itself a posthumous oscar. It’s that good, really. If you thought johnny depp did good eccentric characters, wait till you see this. Pity he’s moved on.

In other news, projects are almost done and dead! Just left a presentation or two to clear up and I have to put on my mugging hat. This time, it’s gonna involve a LOT of studying, I can guarantee that. Studying, not revising mind you.

Exams start on the 18th, end on the 22nd. And normally after such a tiring semester, I would welcome with open arms the long bore known as the 2 months holidays.

BUT.

Attachment. For my entire holidays. 5 day work week, 9-6.30. I can’t just stare off into space like I usually do during holidays. No long hours of xbox-ing. No wishing I got something more interesting to do. I actually have something to do.

I’m really kinda bummed about this. It’s not doing anything during holidays that drives me to study like a dog when school starts. I don’t know how this working during the holidays is gonna do to my pysche!

But at least moolah is gonna roll in. And I guess I would get a taste of how it’s like to be working in the finance line. I just hope I don’t end up buying coffee/photocopying/doing menial tasks. At least make me earn the pay you’re giving me ya know…

Anywho, if you people are bored and don’t know what to do, head on over and play this. I’ve found this to be a fantastic way to de-stress. And distract me from important work.

I’m so psyched up for ‘The Dark Knight’, I can’t possibly see how I am going to be disappointed by it.