As I look back on the holidays and the many people I’ve met, it does tinge me with some sadness.

I’m described best as giving ‘awkward first impressions.’ Bother to listen to some of my friends and they’ll tell you about my now infamous ‘handshake to get to know people’ routine. I think I still do that. Huh.

But yea, I do give awkward first impressions. I’ve done enough soul searching… biological tree mapping… social profiling but I’m ultimately stuck on deciding where to apportion the blame for making me so… weird. Was it my parent’s fault for not having good enough genes? Perhaps theirs for making me so darn socially insecure. Or maybe it’s my fault for having too much interest in technology. And other weird interests. Like reading wikipedia.

Whatever the cause, it spawned the kid who reads online comics. Know random useless junk information like what mosquito repellents really do. Who has big glasses and sucks at being photogenic. Me.

So when I look back at the six weeks, I wonder about the people whom I got to know. Could I have done anything better to know them? Maybe act less weird… or less arrogant. I have a problem with that trait. It’s useful sometimes… but also vastly counter-productive.

But you know, that’s what you get for looking at yourself, or at least trying. You look in the mirror and at one glance you think you know the person who stares back.

But if you stare hard enough, the picture can change.


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